The Computer Cock-Up Page

There used to be quite a lot of these sites on the web, with Windows error messages and other amusing computer related stuff ups, so I thought I would show off some of my own, personal encounters with bizarre happenings, not only in Windows, but Mac OS X and stuff on the Internet as well. Unfortunately, there are a lot of fake error message galleries out there too, which arenít really that amusing. These are all real stuff-ups, and will be my best selections, as I have well over 100 screen shots of computer cock-ups.

Click Cancel to? To? To what?
This has been a notorious problem in Windows, going way back.
Somehow XMPlay got embedded into Corel DRAW 8.
Somethingís not connected, all right!
Lycos has lovely grammar.
Windows XP totally sucks with this file guessing.
Whereís the bottom of the menu?
Hang on, thatís not a document! Itís a program.
Firstly, Bluetooth networks donít use cables, and secondly, the message is stuck behind the taskbar.
Empty? What is that about?
So apparently 0% is actually 200 MB. Wow!
4 menus all active simultaneously. Yikes!
So, what does that cost?
I didnít think deviantArt had been around THAT long.
Well, thatís very helpful.
How many Ws do you need?
Windows hasnít got a clue.
Firefox does this in Windows as well. (See down further.)
On a 74 GB hard drive.
That canít be right.
(Iíve seen an almost exact error pic like this elsewhere too, so it must be a glitch in Mac OS X Tiger. It also happened on my Power Mac G5.)
Firefox on the desktop again.
How did that happen?
Ixquick thinks this ad is related to my search on a review of Windows 2000.
Yikes! This reminds me of a problem I saw in Windows Vista once. This is in Windows XP. It never happened more than once, as far as I can remember.
Not sure what Firefox was after here.
Choose Close. What else is there to choose?!
I donít recall dial-up Internet connections being that fast!
Somehow we have a detached menu item.
How much space free?
Whereís the Taskbar gone to?
Itís gone black!
I donít think so.
Ooh, a stuck thing.
With a dual core CPU, Mac OS X makes out that 200 % is both cores working to their maximum, but is this supposed to be possible?
Yeah baby! What is THIS supposed to be?
What a saving! (Seriously though, Jaycar is a good range of electronic stores.)
Itís nice to know eBay spend their money wisely on advertising.
eBay wanted to make sure I knew the thing was chugging over. (This was a 1600 ◊ 1200 pixel screen size.)
eBay really do have everything, donít they?
The day I quit using Yahoo.
Ooops! Mac OS X kind of got 2 programs together on the menu bar.
Me no like you.
Whatís it doing there then?
No space huh? Whatís that 150.1 MB free then?

English instructions at TurboBit.
Pale Moon canít even communicate with itself on how much time somethingís going to take.
Donít you just love IxQuick? Look at all those search results! Seriously, I have no idea what they screwed for this to happen. I was getting like 2 search results per page, then a massive gap of nothing.
This was more of an observation that a stuff-up. Mac OS X shows up PCs with Windows with an old BSOD from the pre-Windows XP days, because they like to have a little poke. My main PC with Windows XP has this usual icon, where as my PC with Windows 7 shows up as an iMac icon! Maybe it doesnít detect it in the same way.
Since when was my F drive a sub directory of another directory on drive C?!
Oops! Windows decided to use some icons from Corel Photo-Paint instead.
I guess Windows 3.1 wasnít very post-2000 compliant. It still boggles my mind how few people learnt from this, and STILL lazily put dates with only 2 numbers.
Iím not sure what youíd say about this one. When you capture video from my Canopus ADVC-110, you get a date some time in the future. I think video cameras normally specify the date of recording, but as the ADVC-110 isnít a camera, it just comes out with some weird date in iMovie. (This was actually from the 15th of February, 2014.)
The Finder icon somehow popped off the Dock in Mac OS X.
This error message kept coming up at a site called Old Game Mags.
How appropriate that this message came up when I was researching it.
Be forewarned of eye-strain before you open this pic any larger! Mac OS X is generally pretty good at following its own rules, but it stuffs up and ignores your font smoothing choice by putting in that mother-f***ing ďClear-TypeĒ cr*p on these password dialogue boxes. Thankfully they appear to be the only place this happens. If I ever find out a way to disable this too, I will surely have the fix listed. But I highly doubt it, since I wouldnít know where to start looking.

On a side note, from my observations, this seems to be related only to systems using either an Apple monitor, or built-in display. It does not stuff this up on my Power Mac with my HP monitor.
I reckon a lot of these ďcontact your system administratorĒ messages are just a cop-out by the software developers, because they canít think up anything better about why something isnít working. And what makes them think there IS a system administrator? The majority of the time that is YOU, the computer user. I am the system administrator, so what do I do? Talk to myself or something?
I got this beauty on a search site, accusing me of using AdBlock, which Iíve never used in my life. Luckily Pale Moon could remove that section using the code inspector, and I could then use the tab key to reach the search box. But itís amazing what some sites will try to do to you! This kind of thing is an instant page closer which will make you go elsewhere.
Firefox was popping up messages like crazy about whether or not I wanted to accept cookies, and then eventually chucked a fit with a blank sheet window which had no buttons or message on it. The only way out was to force quit the program.
Another instance of the Menu Bar getting mixed entries.
Here we go with IxQuick again, which is more like IxSlow for me these days. Absolutely nothing displayed, and remember, last time I did this picture, I was using Pale Moon (which it picks up as Firefox). So theyíve screwed something. Iíve had this trouble on my MacBook as well.
After deleting some irrelevant receipts and other junk, the trash window had a permanent spinning doodad after I restarted, and then a kooky size for what was supposedly in it. It later jumped back down to the correct size, so I dunno where it pulled this number from.
I got this beauty today (15th of June 2016), when I tried to get a preview of a .BMP file on my desktop, and the W.P.A.F. Viewer decided to try & randomly open some program! When I tried it again, it worked fine. (It happened again ó 31st of August 2017.)
One day, Corel PHOTO-PAINT decided it was going to list the Arial font down among the ďSĒ area for a change.
(This seems to be directly related to QuickTimeís Sydnie font.)
Some weird chunk-up in Mac OS X Leo.
Iím not too sure where Pale Moon pulled this from, thinking a 7-Zip archive was a video file. In its applications listing, it even has 7z as an archive.
Okay, itís not really a stuff-up in that sense, but it is assumptive. That mysterious administrator again. How do they know it isnít me? They should have said: ďThe other computer may still be starting up.Ē
(I spotted this one in some web search results.) Oops! It seems somebody didnít know what they were on about. My guess is they might have meant a Mac Pro, which has a similar looking case.
Yeah, it felt like a b***dy long time too.
(By the way, this works out to about 584 542 046 090.6 years.)
What happened, was the DVD drive died somehow, and brought down half the system. The eject button in the Menu Bar died, and stopped the clock, the Dock vanished and 2 processes became completely dead, which required me to have to hold the power button in to turn off the whole thing.
Oops! Another Menu Bar stuff-up in Mac OS X Leopard.
This time, Mac OS X thought it would be a good idea to pile on the shadows to a really dark level. It was probably caused my multiple instances of these windows appearing in the same place, so it might not really be a cock-up as such.
VLCís always been a bit buggy, but hereís something a bit weird that I discovered. In version 0.86, if you press Ctrl + I to get information, and then close the infoí window, you will notice that focus from the main VLC window has gone. It has in fact reverted to an invisible window! If you press Alt, and then your down arrow key, you can access a drop down menu that lets you maximise it. If you do so, the window will become visible, but it has nothing on it. If you close this window, and press Ctrl + I again, once focus has been restored to the main VLC window, the program will crash.
Iím not sure what Corel DRAW 8 was doing here, with the word being recognised as spelt correctly once, but not again. It doesnít seem to like 2 words in a row.
The Preview program in Mac OS X Leopard somehow ended up with the picture it was displaying in the title area.
Mac OS X Tiger having a tantrum.
Something odd started going on in the DVD Player in Mac OS X Leopard when the subtitles were shown, resulting in these colourful dots at the top of the show.
Just as I was fighting Windows XPís cr*pola Explorer over how it had gone off again of its own accord to decide on how my directories should be sorted and displayed, this funny message came up, which just went to prove how f***ed it really is.
A bit later, Explorer and Dr. Watson both died again!
Macromedia Dreamweaver chucked a fit, and then decided it was going to also provide me with this thing above. Thatís right ó keep it verbose now!
Ooh dear, how could there be more than there is?
Itís been broken for a while then.
QuickTime 7 somehow worked out that the file was of negative size!!!
I dunno what happened here at IMDb, but I donít remember Antonio Banderas having a copyright symbol in his name before.
Open Office 3 chucked a wobbly with text going all over the place. For some reason it was having issues with pictures dragged directly in, rather than pasting them in.
Another Windows cop out. I am the person who manages the network, you dumb $#!+s. Microsoft just loves to palm problems off when they donít have a clue. This kinda thing almost ticks me off now.
Hereís another instance related to the previous picture, but this time it did work. Oh look! Thereís that mysterious guy in the mirror!
I got this bizarre message out of the blue one night in Windows XP. I wasnít even doing anything related to that drive.
Despite having white selected, Photo-Paint went on painting in black.
I got this odd thing with Windows XP using different fonts in dialogue boxes regarding directory properties. The left side one is using the correct font; the right side one is using some other one.
Hereís something that can be a nuisance in Windows 7 ó often when you restart the computer, one of the previously open Explorer windows has the address section missing, and there seems to be no way of getting it back again.
I got this odd one in Windows XP, which Iíve never seen before. What caused it? Sending a file to one of my flash memory units! WTF?!
I didnít think Intel made these CPUs to run THAT slow.
Firefox 52 & Winamp 2.8 do battle over whoís showing what on the screen. This was actually ďanimatingĒ from Winamp through Firefox. It seems something about the way Firefox draws stuff isnít quite too compatible with other programs.
Another odd fudge up from June, 2009. This is probably from when I tried to set up a network to my MacBook, using the AirPort. Note the odd symbols that shouldnít be there, and its confused state of whether itís connected or not.
It should say: ďJohn Kahlerís ComputerĒ, but itís got corrupted or something was misinterpreted.
If a waiter asks how my meal was the next time Iím in Italy, and I enjoyed it, Iíll know how to answer: ďUnexpected error!Ē
How has eBay managed to start delivering things in the future?
My MacBook somehow went 1992 years into the future!
Yes please!
Clicking on ďYesĒ fortunately didnít destroy my whole operating system, but what was this? Thereís nothing listed as being in the bin anyhow! Restarting Explorer fixed the issue.
I found this one in Corel Photo-Paint 8 for the lighting effects. According to the help, the control was actually supposed to change the amount of texture on the surface of the image, however that related to it. But somebodyís left it as saying ďreliefĒ like it was a place-holder for when they were glad they finished it or something, and hadnít put in whatever it supposed to be called. My only guess from what it looks like, is some kind of scattering or something a bit like bump mapping.
Hereís another brain malfunction at eBay. What do they think comes out of batteries? Light? Sound? Nope! Itís electricity. No wonder itís hard to find stuff on there if they donít know what their own categories even mean.

(All interfaces belong to their respective companies. This is mostly just to point out various errors.)